Author Topic: Canny Scots  (Read 159 times)

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Offline drumwrecker

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Canny Scots
« on: September 13, 2018, 12:01:20 pm »
Three local Glasgow lads and three English lads were in a ticket queue at Glasgow Central train station.
 
Each of the three English boys bought a ticket, but they noticed the three Scots bought just one ticket for the three of them. "How are all of you going to travel on the one ticket?" asked one of the English boys.
 
"Ye ha'e  to watch and learn." answered one of the local boys. When the six travellers boarded the train, the three English found seats and sat down, but the three Scots crammed into a toilet together and closed the door.
 
When the conductor came collecting tickets, he tapped on the toilet door,
"Tickets please!"
The door opened just a crack and a single arm handed over a ticket. The conductor took it and moved to the next car. The English boys thought this indeed so clever that they would do the same thing on the return trip. In conversation they found that they were all going to the same football match, so may as well meet again after the match and travel together on the trip back north.
 
That evening at the station the English blokes bought just the one ticket for the return trip, but to their astonishment, the three Scots didn't buy any ticket at all.
When they asked how this would work, again the Scots told them to watch and learn.
 
When they boarded the train the three English boys crammed themselves into the one toilet and the three Glasgow lads crammed into another toilet across the passage.
 
Shortly after the train began to move, one of the Scots lads left their toilet, walked over to the English boys' toilet and banged on the door, "Ticket please"
Its not always the destination that counts its the ride, having a destination just stops you going round in circles.

Offline TomL

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Re: Canny Scots
« Reply #1 on: September 13, 2018, 02:35:21 pm »
So good that I pinched it and posted it elsewhere. ::)
As I have grown older, I've learned that pleasing everybody is impossible, but pissing everyone off is a piece of cake.

Offline drumwrecker

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Re: Canny Scots
« Reply #2 on: September 13, 2018, 07:22:22 pm »
You're welcome Tom.
My neighbour sent it to me.
Its not always the destination that counts its the ride, having a destination just stops you going round in circles.

Offline Phmode

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Re: Canny Scots
« Reply #3 on: September 14, 2018, 09:15:17 pm »
You have the strangest neighbours Ron...

Offline drumwrecker

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Re: Canny Scots
« Reply #4 on: September 15, 2018, 11:52:13 am »
She is a doctor, does that explain it
Its not always the destination that counts its the ride, having a destination just stops you going round in circles.