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Topics - Phmode

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The Euro K Club Lounge / Honda plans Cross-Wind Assist...
« on: February 14, 2024, 09:33:37 am »

Cross-wind assist? Have these peeps got nothing better to do? The planet is in chaos, the world is at war, Trump might yet be the next US most wanted criminal President and they want to foist cross-wind assist on us...

Three times in 60 years on two wheels (OK, more [times, not wheels] if you count the bicycle) have I thought 'Hey Zeus' that wind is strong.

Once, I failed to make exit 12 of the M4 when I physically couldn't get the bugger across three lanes of traffic cos the wind was suddenly gale force.

We had to park up for a couple of hours at a services on the A6 Route du Soliel north of Lyon in the mega gales that flattened the south of England in 1986(?) after being blown across all three lanes and onto the hard shoulder at silly speed.

I narrowly avoided ending up in the Forty Foot Drain crossing the flat Fens on a Wrinklies trip many moons ago when I clearly saw the face of St. Peter blowing a hooley, reflected in the water below.

In none of those circumstances would cross-wind assist have done anything other than induce a high-side or at least a heart attack.

They'll be inventing ABS, Anti-Wheelie and Traction Control next.

Bah humbug I say.

The Euro K Club Lounge / Ten years ago tonight...
« on: December 31, 2023, 11:52:00 pm »
...someone shut down the original EuroKClub on the stroke of midnight.

So, ten years on, the bills are paid for another year, so if it all goes base over apex, it's enemy action and not my fault.

Here's hoping you all had a great 2023 and wishing you an even greater 2024. Brian

Even typing this is a struggle. So what happened?

Well, OK, I cut the end of my left thumb on a sharp gold pin while taking the TomTom off it's bloody, literally now, stupid mount on the little Honda.

Was about to dash into Hereford for a pie and a pint with a mate and had to go by bike as I'm too tight to pay to park the car and for some reason they let bikes park for free. Fairly sure that the rad is leaking on the K as it overheated on its way back from the MoT a week or so ago and that is all of 2 miles so decided to give the wee Honda an outing.

Went out to grab the TomTom to find the car park in town and that's when the bloody thing bit me; cold flesh, sharp bit of nonsense and bleeding like a stuck pig.

The things you can't do when you have a dolly on your thumb:

Type things on the sat nag
Pull my over trousers on
Pull up the zip on the boots
Hold the Halvarssons Horse Blanket while I struggle into it
Get the zippers to align properly
Hold it all while I struggle with the zip

By this time the plaster was soaked in blood and now it was all over my brand new, paint-peeling Schuberth helmet and I still had to get into my gloves...

More things I couldn't do:

Hold the helmet while I wash the blood off
Get the helmet on
Do the strap up

Rip the blood soaked plasters off, staunch the blood and go get two more plasters, but getting them out of the fiddly packet is another thing you can't do with a bloody thumb.

Manage to get the dollied thumb into the oversize BMW winter gloves and then have to put the rest of the plasters in my pocket to phaff around all over agin when I take the glove off.

Then more incapacitation:

Can't indicate properly
Can't cancel the indicator even when I remember to do so
Can't open the visor with the left had
Keep slowing down lifting the visor with the right hand

As you can tell, it was a good day, and that was before even more paint fell off the new, new chin bar of my new Schuberth C5. And before the stupid new SC2 intercom system kept telling me it had failed every couple of miles.

On the upside, I couldn't get my wallet out of my pocket in the pub...

The Euro K Club Lounge / Too old to ride, too idle to work...
« on: November 19, 2023, 10:55:55 am »
Only partly related to bikes and not related to each other.

Having decided to change the Honda for something else from the Honda stable, I popped into the Gloucester branch of Thunder Road Motorcycles on the off chance a few weeks ago. Had a mooch round the showroom, upstairs to the off-road bit and was about to leave when a salesman actually looked up and asked if he could help. Well, I needed a sit down after the shock and so I accepted his off of a coffee and a chat. Told him the story and he agreed with all my gripes about the Honda and was enthusiastic and knowledgeable about the mods I have made to improve the bike.

Have you seen the new CRF300L? Well, not in the flesh!

Out we pop to see the one I had ignored on the way in. He took a towel to wipe the seat dry and wheeled it out from between its mates so I could try it for size. I was amazed at how much lighter it was than mine and I had explained that I wasn't looking for new one but he said I could still test ride it to see if I liked it. I was in the car and loaded down with clobber and hadn't planned on a test ride anyway but then he looked a bit sheepish and said...

'Could I just ask how old you are?' When I told him he said he was amazed and that I didn't look that old (so why did he ask?). 'Only, we have an age limit of 74 for test rides.' He was as gobsmacked at this policy as I was and said especially for the big tourers, that it was a real problem as most of their customers were getting on in years.

Anyway, didn't want a test ride anyway, but how do they expect to sell bikes to folks with deep pockets if we can't do test rides. Strangely, there is nothing on their website, nor Honda UK site about this limitation.

So, obviously, half of this forum is getting to be too old to (do a test) ride (on a Honda).

On to the idle buggers and swimbo is looking for a newer car and has been searching for probably a decade, with nothing fitting her needs which are overly restrictive...

However, one came up in Reading Audi and as she has never actually driven an TT we decided to take a drive and have a test drive.  I recounted my tale of age-related woe in Honda and, being older than me, panic set in about turning up, drivers licence in hand and politely being refused a test drive. How embarrassing...

I'll phone up and check says I. Phone goes to answerphone. Bugger, a bit early perhaps. Ring back later and discover that Reading Audi and indeed all Sytner Group dealerships nationwide only work 6 days a week.

What is the world coming to? One realises that folks need days off but all these big players seemingly have legions of salesfolks to ignore you whilst browsing their stock. Inchcape group sales are all open on Sunday, as are Jardines and most of the others. So, of the 2 days in the week that honest, hard working folks have off to go buy another car, Sytner are closed for one of them.

Now of course, Audi wouldn't close on Sundays if they had customers banging on their doors so one assumes that they don't. So when do those honest, hardworking folks buy their cars? Well, seeing as most of them are probably working from home they obviously do it during the the firm's time.

As for today, Audi's potential customers in Reading are in the BMW, Jaguar or Volvo dealers which are all in business to do business and are obviously looking to do more.

Meanwhile, aged riders in Honda dealerships are being told they are too old for playtime.

The Euro K Club Lounge / How fast is fast enough for you?
« on: November 08, 2023, 11:29:19 am »
How about 800mph? These guys are looking for a new driver...

...with about £12bn backing.

It's on tour from today around southern England, or at least a replica is. More info at bottom of linked article.

I reckon any half decent rapid motorcyclist could manage a few kilometres at the helm before boredom set in...

OK, so you have decided Garmin have taken the pith onthe too many times and thrown it out and have decided MyRoute App is the way to go, on an iPhone perhaps...

Well, it works fine for me apart from one little niggle...capacitive touch screens which are not as user-friendly on phones as they are on sat nags.

That is easily fixed on the move by using touch-sensitive gloves or like me, stick-on capacitive fingerprints. Well, OK, not fingerprints but fingerprint sized bits of capacitive stuff from Oxford Products. I also keep a touch-sensitive stylus tucked into the tankbag cos using that is often easier than getting a clumsy gloved finger to touch the right spot for waypoints etc. and much better than having to take your gloves off. Oh joy!

My device of choice happens to be an iPhone 6S (which is an iPhone 11 or 12(?) in an iPhone 6 case). Great, lovely, super...except I can't unlock the bloody thing even with the touch-sensitive bits on the gloves because of the TouchID feature which needs a human touch on the 'dead' Home button to wake it up.

Well, the touch-sensitive fingertip comes to the rescue there to wake it up, but then I need my fingerprint to unlock it. I could turn the TouchID off in settings but then I have to remember and use the passcode every time which is why I use TouchID in the first place. And then I came across the greatest hack of all time...

Simply put your glove on and using the finger with the touch-sensitive tip, add that as a new fingerprint on the phone.

REALLY? No, really! Apple doesn't need a human fingerprint touching the Home button apparently and so with my summer gloves and the touchy-feely pad on the index finger, I merely went through the 'Add a fingerprint' rigmarole and voila, I can get into my phone with my gloves on with one touch and without having to use the passcode.

Of course, perhaps anyone can unlock my phone with my gloves on...

Makes you wonder who it is who spends all day trying to work these things out.

Ride Out Reports / A nice day for a ride, but...
« on: October 30, 2023, 06:17:49 pm »
...only if your brakes don't keep locking on!

So a short notice meet up with Richard in Broadway, halfway twixt his and mine, for a Cotswold jaunt. The last time the bike was out it was a stinking hot day and today was most definitely not, so it was out with the winter gear and away with the summer stuff, zip in the waterproof liners, stow the summer gloves just in case but wear the waterproof all-season ones and, seeing as we are most definitely not getting an Indian Summer, I might as well bolt the BarkBusters handguards on to keep the pinkies warm. I didn't remember the big gap between the end of the grips and the BarkBusters but it was a year or so since I last fitted them so meh...

And so, all wintered up, off I set. It was only after meeting up and downing a coffee and a huge lump of choccie cake in Broadway that we set off into the bright sun but with the threat of rain always there. We had probably gone about 20 miles when, slowing for a cross-roads, my front brake seemed to lock and the lever went solid on me. I was only doing about 15mph and it was slimy and wet so did the ABS just kick in? I mentioned it to Richard and after the cross-roads I did a couple of brake tests but all seemed fine...and then it did it again at speed, only momentarily but it was a bum-puckerer for sure. And then again! OK, pull over and set fire to it...

We had a quick look at the front pads and compared the temps on my bike and Richard's but there was no clue to be found. And then, whilst fiddling with my lever while I was getting the kindling and matches out, Richard discovered that the front brake lever was fouling the spine on the right BarkBuster on a full pull and would stay 'pulled' after it was released.

Oo'er missus! Out with the tools and adjust it out of the way and all was fine and dandy so I stowed the kindling for another day and we set off once more whilst trying to find out why my MRA navigator wasn't talking to me. We never did and by this time I needed fuel so we diverted into Cirencester and then headed back out toward Burford to continue the jaunt.

What with the rain and the various stops the day was wearing on so we decided to dive into Burford Garden Centre for more tea and cake.

We obviously missed more heavy rain as we supped and scoffed and by the time we were ready to set off again we realised it was going to be getting dark rather soon, what with the clocks having gone back yesterday and so we decided to head off in different directions and try to beat the rush hour traffic.

A nice run despite the rain and puddles and shite all over the roads and after my front brake returned to normal service.

The Euro K Club Lounge / What, you've never crashed on your bike...
« on: October 18, 2023, 09:09:30 am »
...nope, it won't let me! WTF?

...and there is a gratuitous K bike mention in there too.

I don't know if this article made me feel slightly better about my future riding or way, way worse! Still, it won't all happen in my lifetime    :adolf_reduced:

How To - Tech & Forum support / Coolant level check.
« on: September 08, 2023, 11:48:14 am »
Out for a bimble yesterday and it was hot, hot, hot. And so was I. And so was the bike.

Now the rad needs to be cleaned and the beast needs its 18k service so lots of coolant is going to go down the drain one way or another. But when I got home I thought I should check the coolant level anyway. And herein lies the problem I have always had with both the 13 and the 12 before it; I have never been able to see the coolant level in the so-called clear plastic header tank. Not that it is a header tank in a vacuum-filled system but you get my drift.

I spent many happy hours with the 12 shining torches and dipping dippy things but to no avail. There was simply no way to 'see' the level. I decided that if I could see coolant inside the tank with the cap off then that was good enough, put the cap back on and forgot all about it till the radiator blew itself apart within a thousand miles.

And so, there was I on hands and knees yesterday in the sweltering sun trying to see the damn level again. Nope, no way.

I wondered if there was anything in the Rider's Manual showing how to 'actually' see the level.

Well, there's a turn up for the book, both the K13 and the K12 books in fact. There is absolutely nothing in there about coolant level, neither how to check it nor how to top it up. Nothing in fact about ever needing to check it.

It says 'If the high coolant level light comes on take it to the nearest dealer and have the fault rectified', but nothing about making sure the bloody thing has coolant in there before you say 'Bring My Wallet' and hand it over to the dealer?

Even after 12 years of K ownership I still find this omission quite shocking on the part of BMW.

So, if you can see the level through your tank, when peering into the bowels of the tank :thumbsup: where is your level when it is between Min and Max markings on the tank? Inside, there is a sort of rectangular chamber with a nozzle poking up, so is your level above or below that nozzle...I can't believe I'm actually having to ask this.

The Euro K Club Lounge / If it's out of the blue...
« on: August 04, 2023, 10:07:11 am »'s not for you!

Matt Allwright's catch phrase on Watchdog (BBC consumer rights program for those who don't watch UK t.v.) always seemed the perfect way to avoid being scammed either online or off and I try to live my online life in a way he would approve.

I know a lot of folks in here use WhatsApp and we think of it as being secure. This article arrived from my local neighbourhood policing team about scams related specifically to WhatsApp. I know most of us are way too savvy to fall for something as obviously daft as this, but you might know someone who isn't as clever and would benefit from the caution herein. I know at least one person, two including my lovely neighbour, who are active in WhatsApp groups but who live their lives in a cloud of trust and oblivion to the thieves, footpads and ne'er-do-wells of this world and who 'might' just fall for the ruse below.

Whether they would twig it was a scam when it got to the punch line is another matter.

........Reproduced without permission.......

"Large community and religious WhatsApp groups are being targeted by scammers who infiltrate them to try and deceive their members into sending them money. Since January of this year, 268 people have reported falling victim to this scam.
The fraud often begins when a member of the group receives a WhatsApp audio call from the fraudster, pretending, or claiming, to be a member of the group. This is done in order to gain the individual’s trust, and often the scammer will use a false profile picture and / or display name, so at first glance it would appear to be a genuine member of the group.
The fraudster will then call the victim and say they are sending a one-time passcode which will allow them to join an upcoming video call for group members. The scammer then asks the victim to share this passcode with them so they can be “registered” for the video call. What’s really happening is that the scammer is asking for a registration code to register the victim’s WhatsApp account to a new device where they then “port” their WhatsApp profile over.
Once the fraudster has access to the victim’s WhatsApp account, they will enable two-step verification which makes it impossible for the victim to access their account. The scammer will then message other members of the group, or friends and family in the victim’s contacts, asking them to transfer money urgently as they are in desperate need of help."

Forewarned and all that.

Kit Reviews / Schuberth C3 Pro and SRC System Pro...
« on: August 01, 2023, 12:22:14 pm »
Er, well...

My old (as the hills) Schuberth C3 is getting a little, er, tatty and is well past it's sell-by date so I have been looking at replacing it (since about 2015...).

The C4 was a total failure and a PR disaster for Schuberth so we'll forget about that, even though it was vastly improved in its re-vamped form.

The C5 is luvverly and has the ability to slip the Sena (rather than Cardo in the C3) integrated i/c in in about 60 seconds; but it comes with Mesh as stock and that pushes the price up and reduces talk time and is not needed by 99% of riders. And anyway, my head isn't worth the total price of a C5 and integrated intercomm.

So, how about the C3 Pro, still the best selling flip-front helmet in the world. I had intended to upgrade to the C3 Pro a year or so ago and bought the Schuberth SRC System Pro intercomm system, which integrates the whole shebang except the antenna into a replacement neck collar, in anticipation because it had been discontinued by Schuberth.

Fast forward to last Friday when I popped into Sportsbike Shop in Bristol to try, and buy, the C3 Pro. Lovely, stuck it in the boot and weebled my way back home.

This morning I decided to move into the helmet and pulled off the neck collar to connect up the SRC System Pro. All it needs is the speakers sticking in (with the option of using my moulded ear-plugs as well/instead of) and connecting up to the already-installed-as-standard antenna.

So, the antenna will be where? Search around inside the helmet, nope. Search online, not much there. Look in that drawer in the kitchen where everything ends up at some point, not there either.

A quick phone call to Sportsbike Shop didn't get me far beyond 'we have another one in Birmingham if you want to pop in and let them look at the one you bought'.

I suggested that rather than wasting my petrol they could look in the one they have and see if indeed it does have the antenna ready installed as it states in their description of the thing. Or did Schuberth discontinue fitting the antenna into the helmet when they discontinued (for no apparent reason) the SRC System Pro and just didn't bother telling anyone?

Sitting here twiddling my thumbs now waiting for a reply...

The Euro K Club Lounge / Engineering workshop wizard wanted...
« on: July 18, 2023, 05:52:47 pm »
I have a spurious need for some small, thin, unobtanium washers. Well, stainless steel actually but it seems that no one makes what I want, which is M6 Form C shims in about 0.3mm thickness. Oh and I need four of them.

The thickness is not too critical but the Form C bit is. That means that the outside diameter is greater than Form B for a given ID. Form B M6 (standard washers) have an outside diameter of 12mm whereas Form C has an OD of 14mm. And that is the critical bit.

The only thing commercially available seems to be M6 Form B in any thinness you like (I tried these but they don't work) or Form C in 'normal' thicknesses. I even tried US stockists for thin 1/4" x 9/16" which would do also.

So, do we have any clever clogs in here who can think of how to reduce common Form B 'thick' stainless washers down to sub-millimetre thickness or even have the wherewithal to do so...plenty of washers and beer provided to the successful wizard.

Of course, a lathe and some stainless stock would work too...

You don't see too many HGV crashes, thank the gods of little things, so when one goes bang in a big way it always looks way more dramatic than a car crash.

I was looking at the piccies on the BBC news website of one that happened on the M6 on Sunday morning.

Thankfully no one was seriously hurt but it could have been so different. What a mess...

...and then, on the left hand side of the third piccie, I spotted what looks awfully like an enormous cylinder block minus its cylinder head. WTF?

But only five enormous bores showing. But then, the Volvo C70 is a 5 cylinder turbo beast. Surely the whole engine couldn't have come apart in the crash!

Of course, a scrap engine could have been part of the load the truck was carrying, but you don't normally get such rubbish on a modern truck like that.

Brian (who is trying hard not to think of overtaking the thing when that lot happened)

The Euro K Club Lounge / It may not be too late...
« on: April 09, 2023, 02:58:02 pm » save your licence.

Let's face it, with the mega lens on the Glos Constabulary Camera Vans nicking you form 1100 metres, I thought we were all doomed, because whilst it can see me, I'm damned if I can spot a camera van at more than a kilometre.

But 3.7 miles ffs. That is not playing cricket chaps   ::)

No, not that one, we all do that.

There was an article in the media over the weekend about the use of mobile phones whilst driving. Now, we all know what the law says, or do we?

When riding or driving, my phone, historically, has always been in my pocket where I can't get to it so there was no chance of me falling foul of the law by accident. If I wanted to use the phone, then I did it via the Garmin.

However, the article I read (source unknown now) stated that it was unlawful to touch any device, whilst driving, which was capable of receiving or transmitting data.

Now, that is the first time I've seen that definition. My Garmin XT was certainly capable of receiving data whilst on the move; traffic status, weather etc. etc.

And was it also capable of transmitting data when it uses Bluetooth to communicate with my Sena headset?

Since I have started using a second phone as my navigation device, I removed the SIM card so I could demonstrate that it wasn't really a phone if I was stopped for poking the screen whilst on the move which is little different from poking the screen of a sat nag or even poking the heater controls in the car.

So, what is allowed and what isn't beyond the obvious of dialling a number on the screen or texting the undertaker?

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